Rating MA (15 +)
Directed by Paul Fenech (Pauly Falzoni)
If you are a fan of the SBS SHOW Pizza then you will probably love Fat Pizza because you are “sick mate”. In fact, you have probably watched it ten times or more already. Like the TV show, most of the swearing is bleeped out and all the main characters are back. The movie is as far from political correctness and you are ever going to get these days. Every religion, ethnic GROUP and minority GROUP is ridiculed and/or stereotyped. There’s cruelty to animals, people in animal costumes and “fat chicks”. There are plenty of drug references and woman appearing as nothing more than sex objects. If any of this offends, steer clear of Fat Pizza on the DVD shelf.
The movie revolves around Fat Pizza cook Bobo (Johnny English) and his pizza delivery boys Pauly (Paul Fenech), Sleek and the NKOTB Davo Dinkum (that’s the new kid on the block - played by Jabba). Bobo is a 40 year old virgin still living with his Mum (Maria Venuti) and about to marry a mail ORDER bride, Lin Chow who has just arrived off the boat, illegally of course. Sleek is a Lebanese rapper and a hit with the ladies. He dates “fat chicks” as a way of getting with their friends, “the glamours”. Davo has a drug problem and Pauly is always getting in to trouble when delivering pizzas because “Pizza delivery is a dangerous business”.
Sleek’s friend Habib (Tahir Bilgic), a drug dealer, is just trying to find any woman he can. This means trying to score wherever possible, even at Grunge Clubs, with his pick up line “Do you like chocolates ? cos’ I’ve got half a bar” Ha Ha Ha!! Get it !!
The Pizza Restaurant has it’s own problems. They have to contend with Phat Pizza, a rival establishment run by Indians who have an obsession with the word “pussy”. There’s also a visit from the Health inspector, played by Elliot Goblet. Let just say, that cleanliness is not high on the priority list. Spending money is not high on this list either. He even charges his workers to use toilet paper. Bobo also has trouble with controlling his anger.
Sleek is also in trouble, all the crime families have found out about his many sexual exploits with their daughters (or sisters). He has also put home videos of these adventures on the internet. The priest marrying Bobo has also double booked. Will Sleek survive to see the wedding? Will Bobo actually make it down the aisle? If you are prepared to sit through the 99 minutes of this movie, then all will be revealed.
I am a fan of SBS’s Pizza but I must say that while there is a laugh or two in this movie they don’t come thick and fast. I must admit that the McDoggle scene is quite amusing when Pauly is attacked by a bunch of McDoggle clowns and he ends up kicking one of them in the McNuggets. Claudia McPherson (Annalise Braakensiek) promoting the “Abstiffy” and the references to Lindy Chamberlain and Ivan Milat (played by Merv Hughes) were mildly entertaining (but completely tasteless as one would expect).
This is another “chill out” movie when you want to sit and watch a film without HAVING to think but don’t expect to laugh yourself silly. I had to watch “Fat Pizza” twice to complete this review and that was one time too many. I think I will just stick to the television series.

THE EXTRAS

? There is a picture disc, the DVD looks like a pizza. Imagine that !!
? Scene selection - entitled PICK A SLICE.
? There are English subtitles for the hearing impaired.
Special Features are as follows (entitled horny extras):
? Extra cheesy deleted slices (deleted scenes)- There are 15 different deleted scenes for you to view. Some of them were rather funny, and interestingly none of the swearing was deleted. The wedding speeches are worth a watch for a giggle as is “Off the boat” where The Beatles make a rare appearance. You may even learn some new pick up lines from Habib from some of these scenes. The clarity of the footage is quite good for deleted scenes. There is over ten minutes of scenes to peruse in total.
? Listen to the main ingredients (interviews) - There’s an interview with Pauly Falzoni and Davo’s Backyard Blitz. Pauly’s interview is completed with his tongue firmly planted in his cheek. This runs for 3.5 minutes and he basically talks garbage for that entire length of time. Davo gives us a tour of the back yard of the restaurant (runs for nearly 2 minutes - 2 minutes too long in my opinion). Davo’s “builder’s crack” is not a sight I really wanted to see.
? Fully sick pizza beats (music videos) - There’s five here to peruse - “Where’s the chicks”, by Pauly, “Sub woofa” (utter garbage !!!) and three video clips of the Phat Pizza Indians rapping (one was more than enough !!1)
? Illegal burnouts - Pauly, his cousin Carlos and Sleek SHOW you how to do burnouts to attract the “chicks”.
? Frozen pizza photo snaps (photo gallery) - 30 photos of the cast included here, including Annalise in a bikini if that takes your fancy.
? Uncut extra slices of the pizza - There’s an “abstiffy workout” with Claudia McPherson, orgasm scenes (am I allowed to say that ?) and a Fat Pizza porno (10 seconds worth)
? A bit of pizza on the side (theatrical trailer and TV spots) - there is a theatrical trailer here as well as four television commercials advertising its release on the big screen.
Overall there is a good hour of extras, which will mainly interest the male audience. Some of it was quite painful to watch!!

CONCLUSION

Fat Pizza revolves around pizza cook Bobo and his pizza delivery boys Pauly, Sleek and the Davo Dinkum). Bobo is a 40 year old virgin still living with his Mum and about to marry a mail ORDER bride, Lin Chow who has just arrived off the boat, illegally of course. Sleek is a lebanese rapper and a hit with the ladies. He dates “fat chicks” as a way of getting with their friends, “the glamours”. Davo has a drug problem and Pauly is always getting in to trouble when delivering pizzas because “Pizza delivery is a dangerous business”. It is a movie length episode of the SBS program Pizza.
Fat Pizza is certainly not politically correct and may offend some viewers. No religion, nationality or minority GROUP is safe. However, if the movie doesn’t offend you then there are one hour or so of extras to titillate afterwards.